Consistency is vital to children. Learning about expectations for life comes from the consistency of what parents place in front of them. Children need guidance. Over and over again, I hear stories about children being unable to navigate life’s challenges. Life has always been challenging and will continue to be challenging; that is a part of the human struggle. Laying out expectations and consistency for our children provides them with tools to manage through the challenges of life that will inevitably come. I read a verse to my children this morning from II Thessalonians.

This verse struck home as a reminder to myself of my consistent roles as a mother above all else. The work God has specially designated for me as a mother is to ensure raising, nurturing and educating my children to bring honor and glory to God is the ultimate purpose. Choosing this picture of an eyeball was not an accident. That was intentionally placed as a reminder to myself as to the important job of being a mother. Being a mother is far more important than any other job or title I could possibly have.

In practical motherhood terms, what does this look like? To start with, every child is uniquely formed by God’s design with various talents and gifts . Children are continuously bombarded with lies today about how they just need to “follow your heart”. This is deceptively wicked and evil lie. The Bible even warns about this and it is THEE lie that has been sold to generations now through companies like Disney and many others. Work ethic means doing things consistently that may not be enjoyable, it most likely will be against a child’s instant gratification desire, but is necessary to thrive in life. For children, this often means completely school tasks, homework, chores and practicing their skills to develop and grow in them.

Teaching the ethics of hard work means having to deal with the reality of doing things that our children may not want to do. It’s about instilling responsibility and the moral compass not guided by the notions of what a child may want in a temporary moment, but rather about their responsibility to completing and remaining steadfast in their work. Telling children to just “follow their hearts” is one of the worst, most evil and most unloving advice anyone could give a child.

The desires of the heart are constantly changing, even for adults. That notion is akin to building a house on sinking sand. “Just follow your heart” is a recipe for failure and a life of disappointment and remorse. Instead of telling children to “follow their hearts”, teach them about discipline in the difficult tasks, dedication in the mundane, and having a work ethic of praise so they can pray for God to guide them to the path that HE has prepared for them. For God’s ways are high above ours, and teaching children to seek what God has for them instead of what they desire will lead them down the path of God’s designs for their lives. No where in human history has mankind not had to work hard throughout struggles and suffering in order to survive and thrive. No where. Civilizations crumble without discipline, morals, and hard work. All of those things, discipline, morals, and hard work are gifts from God.

We have to teach our children that everyone is created with different abilities and skill sets. No two people are created exactly the same. Also, no child is a mistake! Not a single child was born the wrong way! They were born in the image of God. Sadly, today, many children do know that because American society in particular has lied to generations of children by convincing them they can be whatever they want to be, instead of the truth of being born in the image of God. It is essential to remind our children of these foundational truths in order for them to develop in their natural talents and gifts to ultimately find their place and purpose in life. Taking the gifts that God provides each person is essential to help nurture and develop each child’s fullest potential in the areas where they thrive. It also takes dedication and discipline for children to learn how to harness and build their God given abilities.

The primary example that comes to mind is school expectations and dedication. Being a homeschooling family, having a designated school space at our dining room table is where we usually do school. We have our school corner with our books and supplies so that my children know they can retrieve the tools they need for their various work projects. They know that if they want to earn their games on the weekends, they must complete their homework for the week to earn their game time. Game time is the “payment” they receive for their work and attitudes throughout the week. Providing them with a reliable location, space and exceptions during school hours helps them understand their role as children. Their “job” is to do their work diligently not only for themselves, but for the Lord. By providing this simple consistency in our routine, it helps keep my children on track as well as myself as their teacher.

Providing education, chores, and structure through activities for children not only gives them the ability to learn and develop in various ways, but it also teaches them about respect for others; family, teachers and friends. Whether the activities be music, sports, robotics, chess…(yes, I have boys…so our activities focus on their strengths.) Our calendar changes every semester based on our focus areas, like when children go to college…and every family is different. We have consistent basics throughout the year: reading, mathematics, history, spelling, grammar, science, and handwriting. Yet, each semester opens new opportunities for them to explore their extracurricular activities.

My husband has an excellent way of explaining the importance of education to our children. He explained (and re-emphasized when necessary) that school is our children’s job. We consistently remind our children that, eventually, they will grow up to be men. We do not hide the expectation that they will be responsible for working and their careers when they grow up. It is expected that they will have developed the skills in their education as children to be able to offer positive contributions to society when they become adults. We’re not merely raising our children; we’re raising future men. We’re raising future men of God who will commit their works to the Lord.Consistency is vital to children.

Learning about expectations for life comes from the consistency of what parents place in front of them. Children need guidance. Over and over again, I hear stories about children being unable to navigate life’s challenges. Life has always been challenging and will continue to be challenging; that is a part of the human struggle. Laying out expectations and consistency for our children provides them with tools to manage through the challenges of life that will inevitably come. I read a verse to my children this morning from II Thessalonians.

It is absolutely imperative that parents lay the foundations and ethics of hard work into their children. It is not about teaching them to be greedy or to obsess over work. It is about teaching them the foundations and goodness of hard work, especially in working hard to give our work back to the Lord in thanksgiving and praise. Life is temporary on this earth, and teaching our children to work hard to glorify our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, is the ultimate measure of success. When people stray from these basic principles, the damage to life becomes evident by where they focus their energy and time. Jesus even said,

“For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.” – Matthew 6:21

God’s ways of raising children are laid out in the Bible for anyone searching for Him. His wisdom and love are written into the scriptures to guide each generation on how to raise our children. God’s plans for each of our children are for their good, guidance, and reproof when necessary. So when we teach our children the expectations that God has for each of us, we’re providing them with tools on where to look for answers, even as adults. Inevitably, all of life’s challenges are answered in the Bible for those who diligently seek the Lord’s guidance.
God continually reminds us that we must diligently do the work assigned to each of us. The work that the Lord provides for each of us is different. We each have a role to play in life that God places before us based on the gifts that He provides. We’re raising children of God who will be future members of society. We explain this foundational expectation to them during a rough school day. It is not to punish them; it is to prepare them for the difficulties of life because we love them.